Being a MoM: A Mother of Multiples


MoM - mother of multiplesI was ecstatic when I found out I was pregnant for the second time. We had been trying for a second child unsuccessfully for a long time. At my first ultrasound to confirm the pregnancy, my doctor poked and prodded for a minute without making a sound and then turned to my husband and said, “Do you see that?” I very distinctly remember my husband answering, “Is that two?” I immediately started crying, and the tears did not stop for two days.

Don’t get me wrong, I was thrilled but terrified at the same time. How were we going to take care of two babies plus our older son? How would we afford everything? What would happen to my body? Would I ever sleep again?

Now that my boy/girl twins are almost nine months old, I have adjusted to being a MoM – a mother of multiples. Luckily I have had a ton of help from family and friends, along with support from my twin moms’ group. 

I have yet to get used is going out in public with my twins and singleton (uh, I had never heard of that term before my multiples). The most frequent comment I hear, between the stares, is “Wow, you have your hands full,” but I’ve learned how to embrace that. Pushing a double stroller while lugging a huge diaper bag and arguing with a three-year-old who refuses to hold my hand is really quite a sight. But unfortunately, that’s not the only comment I hear from strangers.

Are they identical? – No, my son is blond, and my daughter (who usually wears a headband) has brown hair. It’s not physically possible for them to be identical; boys and girls have different body parts.
Are they natural? – Of course! I may have had a little help, but they are real babies!
Did you breastfeed? – That’s a pretty personal question from a stranger. Normally I smile and nod yes, but sometimes that even leads to the question of “How?” Figuring that out for myself was hard enough.
Are they all yours? –  Since when did having three children become out of the ordinary? Or do I really look that frazzled?
I guess you’re done having children. – This one drives me crazy. When I only had one child, all everyone asked was when I was having my second. Now that I have three, it’s assumed that’s enough?
I always wanted twins. – Thank you, I guess I make it look easy. Yes, having twins is a very special thing, but it’s a lot of work! Although I get twice the amount of love and cuddles, I also get twice the amount of crying, diapering, feeding, etc. The hardest part is giving each child individual attention.
You must be tired. – I really need to do something about the dark circles under my eyes. I think all parents are tired, but luckily my twins are great sleepers (at least for now). It’s my three-year-old that’s up at the crack of dawn.

I try not to take these comments too seriously. Most of the time, I answer politely and smile while I make a snarky remark in my head. It’s not all that bad. In fact, it’s pretty amazing.

Are any other moms of multiples out there with similar experiences? Singleton mommies, what is the most annoying comment you have received from a stranger?

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Michelle is the Owner and Editor of Fairfield County Mom and Westchester County Mom. She has spent her entire life in Fairfield County, growing up in Norwalk and now residing in Fairfield, CT. Michelle married her husband, Chris, in October 2008. Before motherhood, she thought she was busy, but now life with her son Shane (March 2011), twins, Blake and Brynn (June 2013), Hank the Lab, and Bruce the Frenchie; the meaning of hectic has been redefined! Michelle is also a working mom, teaching third grade at a local public school. When she’s not making lists, chauffeuring the kids, and doing laundry, Michelle enjoys standing along the sidelines cheering on her kids, lounging with a good book, eating dark chocolate, and sipping on some tequila.


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