Screaming Saves My Sanity

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A mom screaming for her sanity.I can’t be the only one who screams and yells at my children. This is what I tell myself at least four times a day. Don’t get me wrong; I love my children. I start most days like Mary Poppins, but they know how to push my buttons even at the young ages of one and five. And boy, can they push me over the edge, so I’m ending the day like Cruella.

Recently, I feel like I’ve been yelling more than ever before (thank you, summer break). I’ve wondered if I should start a separate savings account for therapy for my boys or if my yelling is normal.

It’s surprising to see how many people judge yellers. But I’ve decided to embrace my yelling, as did my mom and the generations of strong Italian women before her.

As moms, we can experience extreme frustration and lose our patience. But so do our kids, and we shouldn’t try to hide this from them. This idea of showing human emotion hits home for me. We live in a time of social media and the image of “perfect” lives.

We all need a reality check. Expressing all kinds of emotions, both good and bad, quiet and loud, can help everyone remember what it means to be human. There is nothing wrong with getting upset.

I’d like to believe that children with parents who yell (or show emotion) are better suited to handle high-stress situations later in life. My boys are often more empathetic, which allows them to be more successful when faced with adversity.

I’m never mean, and I usually start my statements with “I,” which teaches my boys that I’m taking ownership of my feelings. The other good thing about my yelling is that once it’s out, I feel better most of the time, and within five minutes, I’m hugging or kissing one of my boys. Being a parent is no joke. We need to remember that the things we worry that are ruining our children are helping build better adults.

Am I alone, or do you scream and yell?

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Maria Sette
Maria is a full-time mom, teacher, wife, daughter, and sister, who feels pulled in too many directions! Her older son Michael took over 24 hours to be born, and at six-months-old was diagnosed with allergies to dairy, eggs, nuts, soy, shrimp, and wheat…all after exclusively nursing because she was SO SURE that would help him be a healthy kid. Luckily at age 1, he began to outgrow some of his allergies. Fingers crossed the others will soon follow because that plus a husband who doesn’t eat any veggies and Maria always battling her weight makes for three meals to prepare every night. Luckily, Christopher, her younger son, is a cooperative eater! As someone who has always been committed to making positive change, Maria uses her privilege and position as an educator and mom to work toward a most anti-racisit, equitibile, and inclusive world. Recently, Maria has even started getting up at 5am to workout in her basement. (Thank you pandemic living!) She is addicted to reading chicklit on her Kindle app in the dark, most Trader Joe’s products, and watching TikToks.

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