No one really likes to be wrong or to take blame; it doesn’t feel great. However, you also learn from mistakes and consequences. They are a big part of life and growing up. Taking responsibility is a big lesson. It’s still a bit hard for my girls to learn, but they’re getting better as we hit the tween years.
My girls can get upset or even cry if we tell them something they are doing is wrong. This is mostly because they could hurt themselves, or I’m in a rush and want to help them. They all now have a very good idea of responsibility, as they learn it in school as well.
Right now, it’s more of a conversation about who is responsible for what. I do not doubt that reinforcing the idea of responsibility, along with safety and efficiency, will be beneficial to them all in the future.
I have been very open and encouraging of my girls to take care of their things. We’ve had several accounts of one claiming “that’s not mine” and then thinking they don’t need to clean it up or move it. I cannot stand this response, especially if it’s something I ask for help with and that person isn’t around.
We all need to be accountable in our household, and yes, sometimes that means putting someone else’s cup in the sink or a towel in the laundry.
Ideally, I’d like them to pick up their own items, and for the most part, they do (they are very good at putting their dishes away).
I have also come to realize their executive functioning takes time, so some patience is needed as we navigate this busy world we live in. That makes it no less important to enforce as we go through this new stage of childhood.
My husband has also encouraged them with “chores” and a small payment. Consistency is key here, and they look forward to reminding him of their payment. There are many age-appropriate activities to incorporate into everyday life.
I plan to continue encouraging them to take responsibility for their things and be accountable in our home. I hope they become more empathetic to how we all help each other at home, too.
