
Here are just a few times that my unrealistic expectations for my child – and myself – have taken a left turn and left me in an entirely different situation.
1. Swim Class
My Vision: How wonderful! We will teach our baby to be comfortable in the water, frolic and play in the pool, and enjoy a generally lovely family bonding time over shared aquatic fun.
The Reality: My son hated the water. He screamed during his first couple of classes, did the arched-back maneuver when we tried to get him to use a pool noodle, and whimpered sadly while shivering. We’ve persevered, and it’s gotten better, but it’s nothing like what I envisioned.
2. Play Dates
My Vision: We will get together with a few of his preschool friends. They will play nicely with the play kitchen and toy cars he loves. I can enjoy a cup of coffee with potential new mom friends.
The Reality: My playroom looked like a bomb went off. Toys were thrown all over the room (and even directly at a sweet boy’s face!). There was lots of crying and fighting over the same firetruck, and the moms were so distracted. It was more of a workout than anything.
3. The Restaurant Meal
My Vision: We’ll go out to a family breakfast! Since my son happily eats eggs at home, he’ll certainly eat them in the restaurant, allowing my husband and me to enjoy our coffee and meals. It will be a beautiful memory.
The Reality: He doesn’t want his eggs, preferring instead to try and drink my coffee. Ignoring the books and toys I’ve brought and the crayons the restaurant has given us, he wishes to either play with the knife next to his dad’s plate or tear up napkins and fling them on the floor.
I have an energetic and spirited child, and I would not have it any other way. So, while it is rare that my expectations for a situation jive with reality, I’ve resolved not to leave those events disappointed.
Getting through a swim class without crying might not be the happy splashing moment I imagined, but for us, it’s an achievement. Maybe my son didn’t want to share with all of his friends, but he had fun playing. Maybe our breakfast out wasn’t the sweet family meal I imagined, but it was filled with laughter.