I Did a Seven-Day Intimacy Challenge, so You Don’t Have To!


intimacy challengeSex, intimacy, seven days in a row. If you’re an exhausted mom like me, these mere words can make your eyes roll as you adjust your unwashed hair.

I decided to embark on this challenge by following a hilarious comedian and former teen-mom on Instagram, @nottheworstmom. The challenge was simple: pursue your spouse sexually for seven days in a row. This doesn’t mean have sex, but just pursue and see what happens.

Day 1: Off to a good start. Nice to reconnect. Able to laugh with each other. He knows I’m doing this partially because I love him, partially for the content.

Day 2: Actually pretty sexy! Kids woke up, so no cuddling. Immediately back to mom mode.

Day 3: Tired. Already dreading this. He’s too tired too! Yay!! Cuddling was enough tonight.

Day 4: He hung out with some friends. I fell asleep early.

Day 5: Date night! Got flirty when I got home, but then I took my makeup off and passed out. I (much like restaurants under COVID restrictions) close for business by 11 p.m.

Day 6: Had a long day of playgrounds and Ikea furniture assembly but still made time for each other.

Day 7: Finished strong…that’s what she said.

What I learned:

Intimacy doesn’t mean sex. He is as touched out as I am, and sometimes just spending time together, and cuddling is enough.

Switching from mom mode to sexy wife mode is hard. It’s weird to be intimate when I’m covered in sweet potatoes from the toddler’s dinner.

Being mindful of that and leaving mom-mode at bedtime is something I need to work on.

We needed this. There’s been less bickering and more laughing, and that’s not a coincidence. Maybe intimacy challenge month? Every quarter? Maybe not. But a random Instagram challenge positively influenced our relationship, and that’s a sentence I never thought I’d write.

Even though I did this, so you don’t have to, I’d welcome anyone up for it to give it a try for seven days with your spouse, and let me know how it goes!*

*For any babies that come from this intimacy challenge, I will gift you a Fairfield County Mom onesie (but otherwise take no responsibility whatsoever, maybe honorary auntie).


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