Mother’s Day is right around the corner, and by now, the question of “What does Mom want?” is circling somewhere in secret. I will be the first one to say that I am a sucker for the homemade gifts, handprint crafts, and cute little things made in school. I even love it when the kids are asked to name their mom’s favorite things, and they say “chips,” although I haven’t eaten a potato chip in over five years. Those kinds of things are the most special.
That being said, let’s be real about what we really want on our one special day a year when we can celebrate all the things we already do on the other 364 days. Here’s what moms really want this Mother’s Day.
10. Someone else to find it. If no one can use their eyes, it’s as good as gone for the day.
9. A hot shower that isn’t interrupted by kids barging through the door to ask you to open fruit snacks or why their sibling pushed them off the couch.
8. A Roomba with the capability of sucking up large toys and sending them into a faraway abyss forever. (You did, after all, ask them to pick it up 27 times.)
7. To not know or hear about any sort of bodily function or ailment. It’s a booger, booty, and band-aid-free day.
6. Something we don’t have to keep alive. Sure, flowers are pretty and smell good, but we already have enough on our plates. (If you must get a flower, get an orchid. You can basically ignore it for a week, and it will still live.)
5. A real gift card to a real store. “Free hugs” are great, but we want to go to Target and maybe grab a Starbies on the way.
4. Someone else to make and follow through with the plans. What’s for breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Not our problem!
3. The laundry to be done, folded, and put away… not by us.
2. Our car cleaned and vacuumed. Away with the half-eaten chicken nuggets!
And for the number one thing we REALLY want for Mother’s Day:
1. TO BE LEFT ALONE. We love you with our entire being but please, leave us the heck alone for a little while. Let us take a nap or binge-watch a TV show. We love being with you, but we also love not being with you. (And that’s okay.)
Let’s hear it for all the moms out there – the working moms, the stay-at-home moms, the moms who have it all together, and the moms who don’t. The brand-new moms and the moms of older kids. The moms who are bearing the mental load while barely keeping their own sanity.
You are all doing a great job. We are all doing a great job. Your children think you are the greatest, and you deserve to feel it. Wishing you the best Mother’s Day ever. I hope it’s everything you hoped for and more.
