Mommy Needs a Bedtime Routine Too!

When I first became a mom, the biggest shock to my system wasn’t diapers or spit-up or even the mountain of laundry. It was the sleep. Or more accurately, the lack of it.

Back then, every article told me the same thing: establish a bedtime routine early. Babies thrive on consistency. Bath, books, bottle. Lights out. Repeat. And they were right. Routines work.

Fast forward to today, and while I’m no longer rocking babies at 2 a.m., I’m still tired. But the difference is that now I’m driving to late practices, waiting up for kids to get home safely, answering “quick” texts that turn into 45-minute conversations, and wondering why I agreed to check one more email at 10:47 p.m.

The exhaustion just grows up with your kids.

My kids are now old enough to put themselves to bed after a goodnight hug and kiss, but what about me? I need a bedtime routine too.

Because if I don’t intentionally get ready for bed, I will scroll, fold laundry, mentally rewrite tomorrow’s to-do list, and suddenly realize it’s midnight. Then I’m wondering why I feel like I got hit by a bus the next morning. Here’s what I’m doing to change all that.

1. Set a Realistic Bedtime

I used to say I was going to bed at 9 p.m., but with all that needs to get done, it’s unrealistic. Now I aim for 10 p.m., and feel even better when I’m tucking myself in a little earlier. I set an alarm so I won’t get distracted, and I treat it as a non-negotiable, not “after this episode.”

I’ve learned that if I go to bed too early, I feel guilty about everything left undone. If I stay up too late, I’m too exhausted to function the next day. Ten o’clock is my sweet spot. It took a few weeks for my brain to stop arguing with me, but now my body actually expects it.

2. Get Things Ready the Night Before

Mornings in my house are still chaotic. The only difference is that now everyone has opinions. To set myself up for success, I check the calendar for any surprise early practices or meetings the next day. Then I check the weather and plan my outfit for the next day. I also put my keys and bag in the same exact spot (because searching for them is not cardio I enjoy).

3. Pick One Household Chore to Complete

Years ago, I learned something after having twins: the house can be messy and still be okay. I won’t go to bed without running the dishwasher and wiping down the kitchen counters, but I also try to pick one more household chore to tackle. Instead of trying to “reset” the entire house every night, I pick one thing. It might be mopping the floor or straightening up the pile of shoes by the front door

Everything else can wait. I refuse to spend the only quiet hour of my day cleaning a mess that will reappear tomorrow.

4. Put the Phone Down

This is the hardest one. I try (not perfectly, but intentionally) to put my phone down 20–30 minutes before bed. No scrolling. No, “just checking Instagram for content ideas.” No reading group texts that spike my cortisol.

Instead, I read even if it’s five pages. Even if my eyes close mid-sentence. Reading has become my signal to my brain that we are done for the day. As someone who listens to audiobooks during my commute like it’s therapy, this quiet nighttime reading feels like a giant exhale.

5. Accept That Tired Looks Different in Every Season

Here’s the truth no one tells you: you don’t “graduate” from exhaustion. You just trade newborn wakeups for teenage worry. You trade early mornings for late nights. You trade physical fatigue for mental load.

Following a simple bedtime routine hasn’t magically made me well-rested. I’m still a mom. That’s part of the job description. But it has helped me feel a little more in control. A little more intentional. A little less like I’m collapsing into bed instead of choosing it.

So tell me, do you have a bedtime routine? Or are you still in the “one more episode” stage of life? No judgment here. We’ve all been there.