Be the Alarm Clock for Your Teen

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An alarm clock next to a calendar. I slowly peeked into my daughter’s bedroom and saw darkness. She was not awake yet on this school morning. She needed to be, like, 15 minutes ago. Quite the opposite of her younger self, who was happy to be awake in the morning, her teen sleep involves sleeping through a beeping alarm. I began softly talking, turned on the bathroom light to illuminate her bedroom without scaring her, and walked over to the side of the bed she faced. 

I sat down, stared at her sleeping face, with chubby cheeks that made a snoozing thirteen-year-old look like her past toddler self, and rubbed her shoulder. “Wake up, my love.” This was weeks ago. I purposely do this every school day now and love this bonding time. I think you should also be the alarm clock for your teen. Hear me out!

Touch

Kids still need that skin-to-skin contact! So often, we associate it with babies, but bigger kids need it even though they fight it. And while we aren’t snuggling and hugging like when they were toddlers (so sad!), the light rub of the shoulder, push of hair behind the ear, and gentle good morning kiss on the cheek all help with connection. Rightfully, teens want to push you away, and this is a time to remind them you are still here for them. That leads me to the next reason.

Talking

It is a perfect time to talk a little! Not a lot, don’t do that, but words of encouragement to their ears as they start their school day. I like to think of it as bits of positive affirmations to begin the day on a happy note. Connect with your teen by being their morning cheerleader. I’ll also remind my daughter what day it is, what the weather is like, and her choices for breakfast. It’s as though I’m a little personal assistant coming in to wake the queen, and I’m happy to do just that for the time being.

Time

This one is all for me. I’m allowing myself to be selfish here. I know this habit is temporary; I’ll back off once the sun gets up earlier in the day, but for now, I am taking this time to see my child. My two older children do not need me to be their alarm clock, and I know how fast these years have flown by. My daughter is growing in her independence, and seeing it brings me a lot of joy, so I’ll take what I can when I can. Finding time to connect with my teen is invaluable.

This temporary bit of time is fleeting and sweet, and I look forward to being my teen’s alarm clock on these dark school mornings. 

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