My Bumpy Ride to Going Gray

older women with gray hair
life goals

I am happy to say I am almost at the one-year mark of going gray! I wanted to write an update. The confidence I had in the decision has not wavered in the slightest. Alright, maybe one slight moment when I tried a TikTok filter to make my hair look red, and I loved it, but mostly, I have no regrets.

That doesn’t mean it has been easy; the road has been up and down. Here is what happened on my bumpy ride to going gray (the road will continue for a while because I have long hair).

Health of Hair and Scalp

My scalp was a major reason I decided to go gray. For a couple of years before the big decision, I would have burning and pain on my scalp for days after getting my roots dyed. I changed salons several times to see if that was the problem, and it wouldn’t stop.

Some people have told me it could be a long-term COVID thing (I was sick with it for the first time in March 2020), some have told me it’s stress, some have said hormones and being in peri-menopause. The reason doesn’t matter; I didn’t like it. My scalp has been happy for the last year since stopping the dye.

The downside has been the new hair coming in is out of control! It’s all over the place. I have naturally curly hair, and it’s normally all over the place; this new silvery/gray hair takes it to another level.

Janice going gray
Ten months of going gray


I firmly believe in always being true to your own sense of style, no matter how old you are. I did not think my style would change because I was going gray, but it certainly has. I find myself not liking colors as much as I did before. I’m happier wearing black and neutrals. Maybe the change has caused me to simplify my style.

I was always a fan of wearing hats year-round, and that has stayed the same and has been my go-to on days when I feel like I look odd. I picked out new glasses this summer and went with solid black frames for the first time ever.


I’m giggling because I wasn’t sure what to call this section. I’m going with nothingness. As in, I’ve been able to see this change as insignificant. It doesn’t really matter in the grand scheme of life. I can go days without worrying or caring about my hair. I’m guessing that is the epitome of a mature adult! Ignorance has been bliss.

Other’s Opinions

In all honesty, this has been the hardest to deal with. Everyone and their mother (literally) have their opinion on your gray hair. Women can be brutal to each other. Let’s do better! Aging gracefully can look different for each of us, and that’s OK. If your maintenance is dissimilar to mine, that’s OK. We can all be on an individual path.


My confidence has been in the driver’s seat on this bumpy road. It has swerved and slammed on breaks and even flown in the air. My decision to go gray is a part of my aging journey, and the years of feeling less than stellar will shake my confidence whether or not I stop dying my hair. In fact, I believe my confidence would have been on an even rockier road had I waited to stop dying my hair; waiting until the change was more dramatic would have been more challenging for me.

While this road to gray has been bumpy, I am happy and proud that I’ve committed to being my natural and authentic self!


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here