For teens, the end of school is here, and so is one of summer’s biggest temptations.
I’m not talking about ice cream, but rather about teenage sex. Boys’ and girls’ hormones are raging, and some teens are taking the next step and hooking up.
It’s hard to think about your own kids in this situation, but the numbers illustrate how sexually active teens are. In 2023, 32% of U.S. high school students surveyed by the Centers for Disease Control had had sexual intercourse. Moreover, 48% of these students had not used a condom during their last sexual encounter.
Given these numbers, it’s important that parents keep the lines of communication open with teens about safe sex. Safety doesn’t just mean protection from pregnancy or diseases. Connecticut has strict laws regarding teen sex, including behaviors by teens and others that fall into the category of statutory rape. Teens need to be aware of what those are.
Understanding the Age of Consent
One of the most important points to emphasize to teens is the age of consent, or the minimum age when kids can legally agree to have sex. In Connecticut, the age is 16.
That means in our state, it’s against the law to have intercourse with someone who is 13 years old or younger. If the other party is between 13 and 16, it is unlawful to have intercourse unless the other party is within 3 years of the other’s age. For example, it is legal (but not recommended) for two teens to have intercourse if one is 14 and the other is less than 17. If the other party is over 17, there’s a problem.
So, what is “sexual intercourse?” You and your children may be surprised. “Sexual intercourse” is vaginal intercourse, anal intercourse, fellatio, or cunnilingus between persons regardless of their sex. Very slight penetration is sufficient to become “intercourse.” How does alcohol come into play? It is illegal to have intercourse with someone who is unconscious or physically unable to consent to or resist sexual intercourse.
Prosecutors are understandably zealous about enforcing laws against statutory rape, even when parents don’t want to press charges. For that reason, adults need to educate their children to be extra cautious and remember that:
- No always means no.
- When there is a chance that intercourse could lead to rape accusations because of age differences, yes should mean no too!
- If someone is too intoxicated to speak or move, do not touch them.
Signs of Exploitation
Teens also need educating on the warning signs that their teachers, coaches, camp directors, and others may be crossing the line. It can be hard to distinguish between a close relationship and something more insidious. What a teenager believes is consensual may still expose another person to serious legal consequences.
Connecticut has strict laws about sexual situations involving teens and those who supervise or exercise authority over minors. Connecticut General Statute §53a-71 specifies many situations where a person of authority can be guilty of sexual assault in the second degree. One example is a school employee having sex with a 13- to 15-year-old teen who is more than three years younger. Another is a person who is at least 20 years old and in a position of authority (even as a volunteer) having sex with someone under 18. There are many other examples.
In Connecticut, adults who work with children are legally required to report suspected abuse or exploitation. Under Connecticut General Statute §17a-101b, mandated reporters, such as school employees, coaches, and doctors, must report suspected abuse or neglect “as soon as practicable” and no later than 12 hours after developing reasonable suspicion.
Without frightening their children, parents should communicate that these kinds of situations can happen anywhere. They may start with grooming behaviors such as gifts, emotional closeness, or private texting that makes them feel special. Anything that seems “off” likely is, and teens should confide in you for a reality check.
Your teens deserve a carefree and relaxing summer. Help them enjoy every facet of life, with knowledge of the legal boundaries in place, and your love and support should anyone cross them.
Alex Schwartz, Esq., the proud father of three adult children, is a youth and divorce lawyer based in Southport. As a youth lawyer, Alex has helped countless minors get through difficult situations with compassion, patience, and resolve. With more than four decades of experience, he takes a highly personalized approach to each divorce agreement, drawing on his extensive courtroom experience to protect clients’ interests. Learn more about Alex at ahschwartz.com, email [email protected], or call 203.255.9829.
