We visited England recently. My husband and I grew up there, fell in love there, went to college there, and then moved to the United States seven years ago. Living abroad is such an interesting experience. I think it should be something everyone does at least once in their life, even if it’s just for a year or two.
When people hear that we are from the UK, they often ask why we left Europe. On this trip, we got to experience a very idyllic England – amazing sunshine, castles and countryside, time with family and friends, London’s architecture, and a little culture with Romeo & Juliet at Shakespeare’s Globe Theatre.
It was all very lovely. But it didn’t feel like home; it felt like a vacation.
Whenever we land in the UK, the nerves immediately hit me. Honestly, I struggle with the culture. The constant rules that often seem outdated, the ways that are set, and how no one questions those rules, can make it feel small. It’s why many adore it, though, and what others chase.
I’ve noticed that this time around, as we build a life abroad and raise a young family, we’ve successfully integrated two cultures and incorporated the best aspects of both.
On the surface, the UK and America might seem very similar, speaking the same language, but when you dig deep, I find the people in each to be incredibly different, and it is two very distinct cultures.
Here are three things I love about American culture that I didn’t find in Europe or the UK.
- People root for you. You can dream big, and they’ll dream alongside you. No one thinks it’s out of reach or impossible. If you can dream it, you can do it.
- The scale makes you think differently. Texas is almost three times the size of the UK, and while there are perks to the UK being small (I’m thinking of fresh produce, as it has a short distance to travel), I think the scale and vastness of the US are incredible. Living in Connecticut is a distinctly different experience from Ohio, yet we’re in the same country. It’s overwhelming to think I could live in the US all my life and never really know it. But that scale and space open your mind.
- Americans have a confidence about them that some Europeans perceive as arrogance, but in reality, they are unapologetic about being themselves, as well as being direct with others. It saves a significant amount of time, provides clarity, and fosters honest relationships.
Here are three things I love about the UK culture that we bring into our parenting.
- The humor and ability to laugh at yourself. Sometimes the humor (or humour, in the UK) can be pretty dark, but think of all the great TV shows that have come out of it (The Office)!
- The work-life balance is more than just about time; it’s about how people use that time. With distinct work and play areas, and little overlap between the two, people are not finishing work in London and heading home; instead, they fill the pubs, take classes, and ride bikes. There are boundaries in place, and it’s part of everyone’s everyday life. It’s the same in many parts of Europe, the French might go to a bakery everyday for a baguette – they might not even go to the closest bakery, and it would be easier to bulk buy for sure but none of that is the point – it’s the little routines in the day that they savor and stop to appreciate.
- Risk and play are important for kids. Outdoor play is integrated into so much, and with such extreme seasons here, I’ll admit I often find it harder to just ‘let them’ play outside. I feel like it’s sometimes much more complicated, whether it’s due to the weather, bugs, or finding and driving somewhere to play. In the UK, you can often walk to the nearest playground or a nature trail that is close to your house.
