When I was younger, I never would have thought I’d have a problem sleeping. I could sleep through anything! Security had to wake me up in college during a fire alarm because I didn’t hear it.
I was a good, solid sleeper up until I had kids.
Sleep takes on a much different role when your kids are young. You are deprived of it and crave it. I knew at some point, my kids would be grown enough where I could “catch up” on all that sleep deprivation. Well, at least I thought so.
Once I had one kid in college and one in high school, the opportunity to sleep was there — woohoo — yet my body wasn’t taking advantage of it. I was waking up several times in the middle of the night, and then I was exhausted when my alarm went off. I felt like the walking dead at times and thought this was just normal for a woman in her 50s.
The first thing I did was invest in a body metric device to help gain insight into my sleeping patterns. So I started wearing a ring that measured several aspects of my sleep, like how long it took me to fall asleep, how deep my sleep was, how many times I woke up, breathing disturbances, and the efficiency of my sleep. Looking at his data really helped me modify my own habits to improve my sleep.
Establishing a bit of a routine at night certainly helped me. I’m a sucker for a good latte after dinner—yet this was interfering with my sleep quality. I’d have to get up to use the bathroom, and my body was processing the latte —or any late-night snack I’d have —instead of letting it sleep in peace. Nothing like waking up and having your ring tell you, “Perhaps you ate a little something before you went to bed last night.”
Structuring my environment and myself also helped. I moved my phone off my night table. I switched my husband’s alarm clock, helping to eliminate extra light in the room at night. We do have a television in our room that we put on as we fall asleep, but we set a timer as soon as we turn it on now so that when it’s lights out for us, it’s lights out for everything.
I try to go to bed and get up at the same time. I recognize this isn’t always possible, so I do my best to stay within those parameters, given whatever is going on with our family life. It definitely helps and also decreases the zombie mom feeling.
Cleaning up the foods you put in your body also helps. It’s hard to believe all the nasty chemicals hidden in our food that our bodies are not meant to process, but have to. I try to eat well 80% of the time and allow for 20% pleasures. I feel it when I have a highly processed food now; my body can tell me.
While reading about breathing disturbances during sleep, I learned about mouth taping. It’s a habit I am a faithful follower of now, but also recognize it’s not for everyone. If you decide to try mouth taping, make sure to consult your doctor and tell your family so that if they happen to see you in the middle of the night with your lips taped up, they’ll know you are fine! That’s from personal experience.
Mouth taping significantly improved the quality of my sleep (my ring measurements proved it). I was getting deeper, more restful sleep and fewer breathing disturbances. I was skeptical at first because I was such a mouth breather; my nose was always filled with fluid, and I had a regular back drip in my throat, so I thought I would be unable to breathe through my nose. Wrong again! So many of my symptoms were from being a mouth breather. Over time, I have trained myself to breathe through my nose much more efficiently and can now do so during intense workouts instead of through my mouth. My daughter (15) started mouth taping about a year ago and similarly reported much more restful sleep and less nasal mucus.
Another intervention that has helped me is taking magnesium in the evening. As we age, hormonal changes can affect our bodies. It’s a good idea to get your vitamin levels tested, but many of us are deficient in magnesium, potassium, D, or B vitamins.
There are many resources available if you are having trouble sleeping. I’d still like to try grounding sheets to see how they feel. Maybe aromatherapy might be your thing, or a heated sleep mask. I know some of these simple tips have given me huge benefits in my sleep and how I function.
It’s not just a function of your age or your stage; it’s also the effort you put into yourself as a mom with all you do—you are worth it—and the small changes may help you achieve a well-rested soul.
Always consult a doctor to find out what will work best for you.
