There is so much beauty to come out of challenges. I’m unsure if we have lost sight of this as a society, as we and our children have become more reliant on technology, quick fixes, and access to answers within seconds. Sometimes, we forget how rewarding it feels to work hard through a challenge.
I write this as I help my nine-year-old daughter work through a challenge. She is a competitive dancer, and it is an extremely large commitment for someone her age. New this season, she is at the studio six days a week, doing eight competition dances, including her solo and duo.
My daughter is a hard worker in all aspects of her life. She puts a lot of focus and energy into doing well in whatever she does. When it comes to dancing, she has reached a bit of a turning point. She trained all summer and, through her training, jumped physical hurdles and gained confidence.
This season, her solo pushes her out of her comfort zone. It is in a genre she has to work for and tests the limits of what she can do. It is fast and fun, but truly, it is hard.
My girl is tough. Not a lot phases her, but when something bothers her, she wears her emotions on her sleeve. When she learned the solo, I knew it would be something she would have to work for. This is not always easy for someone who typically picks things up quickly. I knew this from watching her practice; after her first rehearsals, she felt defeated.
This is where I get conflicted. As her mom, a part of me wants to swoop in and save her. Again, she is only nine, and there will be other opportunities for a challenging solo. I know that I can cancel the solo and that she can focus on her groups and duo.
And, fellow dance moms, I’m sure you’ll relate, but I lost sleep over this.
After a few days, I decided to have a serious conversation with my daughter. I explained to her that everyone working with her, including her dad and me, knew she was capable of the dance. We believe in her, and she needs to believe in herself. We also all know that she can put in the work.
And, after she cried it out, she did just that.
Over the past couple of weeks, I have watched my daughter spend every evening, after being at the studio for multiple hours, come home, do her homework, and then practice her dance. Each time, I see her improving at the dance and more confident in her ability to achieve this challenge. I watched her attend her most recent rehearsal, nervous but successful. She advocated for herself, made a few changes, and now she’s ready for the dance to be cleaned.
Whether she places or earns platinum, high gold, or gold with this dance does not matter. What will matter is her overcoming a difficulty, getting on stage, and performing a dance that is so much fun to watch. And regardless, her dad, teachers, teammates, and I will be so proud!
